Meet the Author jurassic Girl
September 16, 2024

Meet the Author: Michele C. Hollow

  • Meet the Author

In our latest installment of our Meet the Author series, we talked to Michele C. Hollow, author of one of our newest juvie books Jurassic Girl.  This book delves into the unique discovery of 12-year-old fossil hunter, Marry Anning. A book for children who are fans of STEM, dinosaurs, and fossils.

Introduce yourself!

I’m a journalist who writes about health, climate, cats, dogs, wildlife, and people who do extraordinary things. What I love most about journalism is it allows me to be curious, to ask questions, and to—often—find answers. 

Journalism led me to writing a book about Mary Anning. 

Describe your book in three words.

Triumphs Over Hardship.

Jurassic Girl

Why did you choose historical fiction for this story?

I love history. In school, history and writing (English classes) were my favorites. Everything in my book, Jurassic Girl: The Adventures of Mary Anning, except for the dialogue is nonfiction. I wanted to tell a story and thought it would move at a better pace if I included dialogue. Obviously, I couldn’t go back in time; Mary’s first major discovery occurred in 1811. A time machine would help. Since they don’t exist, I made up the dialogue.  

What are you currently reading or watching?

I just finished reading “Lula Dean’s Little Library of Banned Books,” which I highly recommend. I also just finished “The Dragon from Chicago.” I also reread “Holes;” it’s one of my favorite books. I also recommend “The Angel Makers.”

I am watching “Lucifer” reruns. I love that show. I just started the new season of “The Umbrella Academy.”

What is your favorite dinosaur?

I love birds, which scientists say evolved from dinosaurs. Scientists found dinosaurs got smaller over time and that all dinosaurs had feathers. My favorite are flying dinosaurs (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-7iXyYS0uw). Actually, pterosaurs are flying reptiles. Like birds pterosaurs had hollow bones, which enabled them to fly with ease.

What is so fascinating about these discoveries?

In the early 1800s the word “dinosaur,” which is Greek for “terrible lizard,” didn’t exist! It became a word in 1842. I try to imagine Mary Anning and others discovering and learning about ancient creatures for the first time. It’s fascinating. 

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Thanks for answering our questions, Michele! For more juvie books similar to Jurassic Girl, see below.

Michele C. Hollow headshot - Michele C. Hollow

LEARN MORE ABOUT MICHELE

Michele C. Hollow

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September 10, 2024

Overnight Cinnamon Rolls Recipe

  • Recipes

Get ready bakers, we’re giving you some of the most delicious bread recipes! With the release of 30 Breads to Bake Before You Die, we wanted to give fellow readers and bakers this Cinnamon Roll recipe from Kate Wood.

While store-bought cinnamon rolls can be convenient, nothing compares to the homemade version! These cinnamon rolls might seem intimidating, but they’re well worth the effort.

Whether you’re enjoying them with a morning cup of coffee, as an afternoon indulgence, or sharing them with friends and family during a special occasion, cinnamon rolls have a way of making everything feel a little more cozy. Let’s get baking!

Share your recreation with us @ulyssespress.

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Overnight Cinnamon Rolls from—30 Breads to Bake Before You Die

Cinnamon rolls are an entire vibe. When you start your day with a gooey, cream cheese frosting–topped roll, you are setting the tone for all the giddy-inducing indulgence to come. You are setting an intention to seize that day, and all the butter, brown sugar, and cinnamon it has to offer. You are calling out to the universe, “Yeah, I know I should be eating overnight oats and doing the laundry, but I’m going to sit here and ingest half of my daily calories in under 10 minutes anyway.”

But, alas, first you must plan for this kind of day. These cinnamon rolls need to sit in the fridge overnight so that all that sticky filling can marinate in its sweetness. So do the right thing today and get your dough prepped, knowing that tomorrow is a cinnamon roll vibe kind of day.

Makes: 12 to 14 rolls | Active time: 45 minutes | Total time: 1 day, 45 minutes

For the Dough:

1 cup (240 grams) milk, lukewarm
¼ cup (60 grams) water, lukewarm
1 tablespoon active dry yeast
6 tablespoons (85 grams) unsalted butter, melted but not too hot
1 large egg, plus 2 egg yolks
¼ cup (50 grams) brown sugar
¼ cup (50 grams) granulated sugar
2¾ cups (385 grams) all-purpose flour
1½ cups (210 grams) bread flour
½ teaspoon salt

For the filling:

5 tablespoons (70 grams) unsalted butter, melted
1 tablespoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice, if desired
¾ cup (150 grams) brown sugar

For the frosting:

4 ounces cream cheese, room temperature
¼ cup (55 grams) unsalted butter, room temperature
1 cup (115 grams) powdered sugar
2+ tablespoons milk

Directions:

1. In the bowl of a stand mixer or a large bowl, combine the milk and water and sprinkle the yeast over top of it. Allow the yeast to dissolve, about 5 minutes. Stir in the butter, egg, egg yolks, brown sugar, and sugar until smooth.

2. In a small bowl, combine the flour, bread flour, and salt. Dump about half of the dry ingredients into the yeast mixture and stir until combined. Pour in the remaining dry ingredients and knead in the bowl using the dough hook attachment until smooth and slightly tacky, about 7 minutes. If you notice your dough isn’t pulling away from the sides of the bowl or it’s too wet, add flour 2 tablespoons at a time until the dough pulls away from the sides of the bowl and forms a little dough “tornado” around the dough hook. Once done kneading, place the dough into a large lightly greased bowl and cover tightly with plastic wrap to double in size, about 1½ to 2 hours.

3. Once the dough has risen, dump it out onto a lightly floured surface. Use a rolling pin to roll it out into a large rectangle, about 11 x 21 inches in size. Pour the melted butter and spread it out over top.

4. Combine the cinnamon, pumpkin pie spice (if using), and brown sugar and sprinkle evenly over the buttered dough. Starting with one of the long ends, tightly roll the dough from end to end and pinch the edges together to seal. Cut the dough into 1½-inch sections and lay them out 2 inches apart in a lightly greased baking dish. Cover with plastic wrap and place in the fridge overnight.

5. In the morning, remove the rolls from the fridge and preheat the oven to 350°F. Keep the baking dish close to the oven while it preheats to help the rolls come to room temperature. Once preheated, bake in the oven for about 22 to 25 minutes, or until the edges are barely golden and the internal temperature is 190°F. Remove from the oven and prepare your frosting.

6. Cream the cream cheese and butter in a large bowl at medium speed until smooth, about 1 minute. Add the powdered sugar and milk and beat to combine. Add additional milk to thin out the frosting or more powdered sugar to thicken it. You can also gently warm the frosting to pour over the rolls as a glaze. Cinnamon rolls are best enjoyed warm.


Want to bake more fun desserts? Check out this funfetti cookie recipe from 50 Things to Bake Before You Die.

Buy the Book!

30 Breads to Bake Before You Die

Master the art of breadmaking with this gorgeous baking book featuring 30 delicious bread recipes from famous bakers, including Duff Goldman, Maurizio Leo, Joanne Chang (Flour Bakery), Zingerman's Bakehouse, and more! This is a bread book for people who really, really love bread in all its wondrous forms—but who also

Learn more
New release

Remember to Preheat the Oven!

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August 14, 2024

Kamala Harris Coloring Book: Free Downloadable Page

  • Book Sample

kamala harris coloring bookCelebrate Kamala Harris, the first female Vice President of the United States and her 2024 presidential campaign with this unofficial coloring book for adults!

Get inspired with 18 quotes and illustrations of this trailblazer breaking barriers as a determined prosecutor, a dedicated Senator, the Vice President, and now on the path to the presidency. On each page, you’ll discover key moments of Kamala Harris’ career, her advocacy for justice, and her vision for a brighter future. Coloring pages include:

– “We did it, Joe!”
– Kamala Harris getting sworn in as Vice President of the United States of America
– “You exist in the context of all in which you live and what came before you.”
– Kamala Harris on Air Force 2
– And so much more!

So grab your favorite coloring tools, unleash your creativity, and celebrate Kamala Harris!

Share your creation on socials and tag us @ulyssespress! Happy drawing.

*This book is not associated with, authorized, or endorsed by Kamala Harris or her campaign*

 

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Click to Download Free Coloring Page

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July 26, 2024

Ultimate Summer Book Guide

  • Book Guide

Summer is a season that invites us to slow down and savor life’s simple pleasures. It’s a time when long, sun-drenched days are perfect for outdoor adventures, whether lounging on a sandy beach, hiking through lush forests, or enjoying a picnic in the park. The vibrant colors of blooming flowers and the refreshing taste of seasonal fruits and ice-cold drinks remind us of the beauty of nature. Summer also brings people together, with barbecues, music festivals, and family gatherings creating amazing memories. As the sun sets on these warm days, the cool evening breeze carries the promise of relaxation and renewal, making summer a time to unwind, recharge, and embrace the joy of the present moment. So, make the most of Summer with us as we share the best way to experience it with a round-up of Ulysses Press books!


Grilling…

Grilling with Foil Packets

What’s better than waking up and making breakfast on the grill? Maybe making breakfast, lunch, and dinner, on the grill all while being mess free! Make outdoor cooking even easier with a simple, everyday household item: aluminum foil. Simply combine the ingredients into a foil packet and then toss it on your trusty grill. Before you know it, the entire family will be enjoying a delicious and satisfying meal (not to mention, cleanup is a snap!).

More here.

The ‘Ohana Grill Cookbook

I’m here writing blogs for you guys, I can’t just get up and go on vacation! So, what do I do? I cook some Hawai’i inspired recipes in the backyard instead! You can have your own personal luau every night with delicious recipes made for your outdoor grill. Written by two Honolulu-based writers, this book uses their island upbringing to explore the diverse cultures and flavors that make up Hawaiian grilling.

Totally using this for dinner:

The Horror Movie Night Cookbook

Summerween!!! Maybe only a handful of us celebrate, but don’t blame us! It’s almost time for spooky season, but not quite yet, so make the most of it. Slay movie night with frighteningly delicious food and cocktail creations inspired by your favorite scary movies, perfect for fans of spooky season and movie buffs alike!

Does Twilight count as a horror movie?

Drinking…

The Hard Seltzer Cocktail Book

Ah, sitting on a water raft and just floating in a river letting the current take me away while I have a seltzer in hand. Truly the best way to beat the heat. Live your best hard seltzer life with the original cocktail book designed to make your favorite bubbly boozy beverage all that much boozier, from sparkling cosmos and daiquiris to a twist on the ever-popular Aperol spritz.

Check it out!

The Turn of the Screwdriver

Okay maybe river-rafting isn’t your thing, we got you covered! Lay a blanket outside or maybe stay in with the air conditioning and start reading your favorite book all while having an inspired cocktail. Shake up some dark and brooding cocktails with 50 drink recipes inspired by your favorite gothic horror books, like Interview with a Vampire, Frankenstein, Jane Eyre, and Wuthering Heights—a perfect gift for booklovers and mixologists!

#Lit

Snacking…

Once Upon a Rind in Hollywood…

Make movie night extra exciting and build a snackboard! Lights, Camera, Snacktion! Whether you’re streaming an AFI classic or classically bad movie, munchies are a must-have. This unique cookbook offers 50 different snack board ideas, from timeless cheese boards and charcuterie to candy platters and cocktail pairings, all themed around iconic movies.

Definitely wondering what a Twisters inspired board looks like. Please include Glen Powell in it.

The I Love Trader Joe’s® Snack Boards Cookbook

Go out with your bestie and go to Trader Joe’s! Make a cute snack board and enjoy it watching the sunset, preferably in a park or beach. Create stunning boards, creative charcuterie, and delicious spreads for every occasion with 50 recipes featuring your favorite Trader Joe’s® products.

Hold on don’t eat the strawberry, I have to take a pic.

Activities…

The Romantasy Coloring Book

Did you touch that TBR pile yet?…. Get to it and have this romantasy coloring book next to you! Featuring 24 illustrations inspired by all the best parts of romantasy books, this captivating collection will have you bringing mythical creatures, magical landscapes, and ethereal characters to life through color.

Save me fictional MMC, save me.

What About Yarn

Pick up another hobby and learn to crochet the cutest clothing items! What’s another hyperfixation hobby to add to the list? Step out in a brand-new look with this collection of creative stitches and stylish crochet patterns for cute tops, fun accessories, and more!

(We have the Harry cardigan in here)


So! Make the most out of Summer and hey use these books every season. Tag us in all your adventures and recreations @ulyssespress.

SUMMER 2024 RELEASES
July 23, 2024

Our Back to School Guide: Education Books for All Ages

  • Book Guide

It is that time of the year where we start packing the swimsuits and opening up the education books to get ready for school once again! If you’re looking to practice techniques, refresh your math or reading skills, or need to get yourself or your kids back in the school mentality this book guide is for you. Going back to school can be fun for everyone in the household with the right tools!

Ulysses Press has a long list of education books, you can find the full backlist here.


The Growth Mindset Coach

A complete and easy-to-follow guide for inspiring every student with the power of growth mindset. Created by teachers for teachers, this is the ultimate guide for unleashing students’ potential through creative lessons, empowering messages and innovative teaching.

More here. 

 

Brain Games for 8 & 9 Year Olds

Brain Games for 8 Year Olds Brain Games for 9 Year Olds

Whether you’re a teacher or parent, finding new and exciting ways to stimulate your child’s mind has never been easier! Discover the best puzzles and engaging problems for kids ranging from 8-9 years olds.

More here.

Teach Reading with Orton-Gillingham

Give young readers the tools they need to improve reading fluency and master letter-sound relationships with this teacher-friendly book of multisensory lessons based on the proven Orton-Gillingham (OG) reading approach.

More here. 

The Adventures of the Plott Family: A Decodable Stories Collection

The Adventures of the Plott Family

Improve confidence in reading for struggling readers and children with dyslexia with this decodable chapter book collection filled with fun and exciting adventures; featuring six separate stories all in one big book.

More here. 

 

Happy reading!

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July 13, 2024

Mastering Self-Regulation: A Book Guide

  • Book Guide

Self-regulation. Maybe you’ve heard of it or maybe this is your first time even hearing the word. Regardless, let’s get into the basics – what even is self-regulation?

Self-regulation is basically how we manage our own emotions, thoughts, and actions, especially when things get tough. Imagine you’re feeling really stressed out or upset, but instead of letting those feelings take over, you find a way to stay calm and focused. It’s about controlling impulses, like resisting the urge to snap at someone or procrastinate on important tasks. By practicing self-regulation, you can work toward your goals more effectively, handle challenges with a cool head, and maintain better relationships. It’s like having a personal toolkit for navigating life’s ups and downs with resilience and patience.

Now…how can I start? Is it even possible to start right now? Don’t worry, we got you! Check out this book round up on authors who have mastered self-regulation.


A Parent’s Guide to Self-RegulationParents guide to self regulation

This book will demystify the concepts of dysregulation and parental self-regulation, and will normalize prioritizing these skills for parents, before bringing the concepts into parenting children. With this book’s step-by-step framework, you will learn how to mitigate tough parenting moments, develop self-regulatory skills, and read real accounts from other parents. From addressing societal myths about dysregulated parenthood to tips on re-parenting yourself for better regulation and everything in-between, this book will serve as both a friendly companion and a source of solid, evidence-based advice.

A Parent’s Guide to Self-Regulation is written by Dr. Amber Thornton, a clinical psychologist and mother of two, who knows what it feels like to struggle with dysregulation and self-regulation as a parent.

More here.

The Self-Regulation Workbook for Kids

Help your child identify, understand, and take control of their feelings with the kid-friendly cognitive behavioral therapy and self-regulation exercises in this easy-to-use workbook.

The Self-Regulation Workbook for Kids allows kids to explore and express their feelings, guided by a relatable character and reinforced through interactive worksheets and proven exercises. The CBT-based activities and advice in this workbook will empower children with concrete coping skills and techniques that they can return to each and every time they start to feel upset or stressed.

Check it out here.

The Self-Regulation Workbook for 3 to 5 Year Olds

Discover play-based activities, CBT exercises, and coping strategies to help children ages 3 to 5 with social and emotional functioning, attachment patterns, and handling anxiety and other strong emotions!

Activities within the workbook are play based to help young kids foster a healthy self-image and develop self-regulation skills necessary to manage stress, anxiety, and other big emotions. Additionally, the activities will include reflective opportunities for adults to help strengthen their relationship with the child. The reflective process is necessary for co-regulation, an essential aspect of self-regulation. These activities can be utilized repeatedly and adapted across ages and settings, as well as assist in navigating social and emotional developmental milestones.

More here.

Break Free from Reactive Parenting

Wherever you are in your parenting journey, there are ways to improve, connect, and find calm in the chaos. Instead of repeating the same patterns, feeling overwhelmed or uncertain of what to do next, today can be the day you let go of the guilt and shame around feeling like a “bad” parent or telling your child they’re being a “bad kid.”

Break Free from Reactive Parenting offers up a new approach toward self-regulation and child expression, focusing on the family as a whole to create a calmer, more equitable home environment. From addressing the issues that cause and result from being reactive to implementing a more effective parenting approach, this book serves as your support system as you seek to bring meaningful change into your home.

Best golf courses in the U.S.
July 8, 2024

Best Golf Courses to Play in the United States

  • Book Sample

Golf Bucket ListTired of playing the same eighteen holes every weekend? Then this book is for you. The Golf Bucket List will introduce you to new ways for you to enjoy the game of golf, from the 10 most unique golf experiences you should try, to the 10 knee-knocker tee shots you need to hit, to advice for how to play at the most exclusive U.S golf clubs.

Whether your golf game is on par with the pros or you’ve only just picked up some clubs, The Golf Bucket List is the perfect way to immerse yourself in the world of golf—and have fun while doing it!

Below, check out an excerpt on the best golf courses every golfer should play in the United States.

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Ten Best Golf Courses to Play in the United States

PINEHURST AND THE NORTH CAROLINA SANDHILLS

Had the wee Scottish golf pro Donald Ross not emigrated to the United States and taken up residence in the Sandhills of North Carolina, perhaps the area would still be the barren wasteland it was at the turn of the twentieth century. You could certainly make an argument that without Donald Ross’s imprint, the region around Pinehurst may still have golf, but not the golf it has. Ross was a talented player brought to Pinehurst by the town’s founder, James Tufts, a decision that changed golf not only in Pinehurst but throughout America.

During the 1880s, Tufts, tired of brutal New England winters, used the profits of a successful soda fountain business to head to the warmth of southern places like Florida or the Bahamas. Concerned that working-class New Englanders didn’t have the resources for such a trip, he looked for a place where he could re-create everything rich and charming about New England, minus the winter cold. He was a regular on the north-south train route, getting off at various destinations, until one day in 1895 he disembarked in Southern Pines. He met brothers Henry and J. R. Page, and they cut a deal for 4,703 acres of sandy loam, thick with towering pines but thin on promise. Tufts had just sold his share in the American Soda Fountain Company for $700,000, a pittance of which he used to pay the Pages’ asking price of $1.25 per acre, although some locals said he was swindled, claiming the land was worth only 85 cents an acre.

Tufts, not a robust man physically but quite robust in business, probably didn’t care about the price per acre. He heard the Sandhills had a natural healing quality and was determined to build a town where New Englanders, many of whom suffered from tuberculosis and other ailments, could come to get healthy.

The oddity of the topography of south-central North Carolina—beach-like sand sprouting towering longleaf pine trees—would be otherwise insignificant if it weren’t for the fact that the terrain, like the linksland of the British Isles, is so ideally suited for golf, which was no more in Tufts’s original plan than a 16-story hotel. But Tufts’s love of the wholesome, small-town virtues of New England transplanted into the more hospitable climate of North Carolina would evolve to become one of the world’s great golf destinations.

He commissioned Ross to build four courses at his new resort in Pinehurst, and the young pro found his calling. Today, those four courses, including US Open venue Pinehurst No. 2, remain the centerpiece of golf at the resort that has grown to 10 courses while his work at nearby Pine Needles Lodge and Golf Club, Mid Pines Inn and Golf Club, and Southern Pines Golf Club create the attraction golfers gravitate to, complete with the charm of New England and the hospitality of the South. Thankfully, Ross ventured out from the Sandhills to design courses around the country, including all-time greats like Seminole Golf Club in Florida, Oakland Hills Country Club near Detroit, Oak Hill Country Club in Rochester, New York, Aronimink Golf Club near Philadelphia, Scioto Country Club in Columbus, Ohio, and East Lake Golf Club in Atlanta. In all, Ross designed about 400 courses around the county.

Since his death in 1948, dozens more modern courses have been built to supplement Ross’s Pinehurst classics. Places like Talamore Golf Resort, Mid South Club, Tobacco Road Golf Club, and Legacy Golf Links have all become great complements to the main features. And it all started inadvertently when Tufts lured Ross to what was once considered a sandy, god forsaken wasteland.

SOUTH CAROLINA COAST

If Myrtle Beach is a smorgasbord of cheap seafood restaurants and gentlemen’s clubs, perhaps it’s only because the South Carolina coast needs a balance to the abundance of classy establishments of Charleston and Hilton Head Island. I’m not knocking Myrtle Beach, I’m just saying it’s different. Clearly, its formula for drawing groups of golfers year-round has worked for decades. It is time-tested and proven, and without Myrtle Beach, American golf would lose a major appendage. But the entire coast of the Palmetto

State is an attractive destination to the golfing population of the Northeast, Canada, and beyond.
Along the Grand Strand, which includes the entire Myrtle Beach area and even spills into southern North Carolina, there are more than 80 courses, although that number is down from more than 100 at Myrtle Beach’s peak at the beginning of the century. Those left in the culled herd are largely the ones proven to be the best over the decades, from the historic Pine Lakes Country Club, which opened in 1927 as the first course in the beach resort area, to the wonderful Dunes Golf and Beach Club designed by Robert Trent Jones in 1949, to modern gems like the four courses at Barefoot Resort and Golf and the Mike Strantz–designed Caledonia Golf and Fish Club. The Grand Strand’s deep bench, improving food scene, and always prevalent nightlife keeps it among the world’s greatest golf destinations.

The southern extreme of the Grand Strand almost melts into the northern reaches of Charleston, and if there is a classier city, I haven’t been there. Charleston teems with history, museums, fine dining, beaches, and a downtown area with something interesting on every corner. Even the golf seems to be more stylish than in most cities.

That’s largely thanks to three islands:
• Kiawah Island is famous for its Ocean Course, which hosted the famous “War by the Shore” Ryder Cup in 1991, and its four supporting layouts are outstanding as well.
• Seabrook Island is more subdued and home to the Robert Trent Jones–designed Crooked Oaks and the more modern Ocean Winds, both of which roam through marsh, maritime forests, and centuries-old moss-hung oaks.
• On the Isle of Palms, the Links Course at Wild Dunes Resort rolls through dunes to the climatic oceanside finish. The Harbor Course isn’t quite as wild but a fun routing nonetheless.

The mainland is anchored with courses like Dunes West Golf Club, RiverTowne Country Club, and the Links at Stono Ferry. And if there’s any way you can possibly finagle a starting time at the private Yeamans Hall Club, you won’t be disappointed by the reinvigorated Seth Raynor design from the 1920s.

Everything is considerably more modern on Hilton Head Island. It was 1969 when Jack Nicklaus helped a former insurance salesman from Indiana clear golf holes through the maritime forests of the island to create Harbour Town Golf Links at the Sea Pines Resort. It became a classic almost from the time the first tee shot was hit. The Professional Golfers’ Association of America (PGA) Tour event now known as the RBC Heritage has been played on the course since its opening. Much of the rest of the land on the island, which is a little more than half the size of Nantucket, is crammed with 29 courses and there’s not a slouch among them.

THE MONTEREY PENINSULA

Hindsight being what it is, I now realize it was a mistake for me and three friends to fly across the country two days after New Year’s Day for a tee time at Pebble Beach. The post-holiday crowds at the airport and the burden on the airlines to get everyone home caused lengthy delays I should have anticipated. Of course, it was my own fool self that booked a flight into San Francisco when San Jose is the appropriate and closer airport to the Monterey Peninsula. It all added up to a late-night landing, rental car fiasco, and drive into the small hours of the morning to a cheap hotel in Carmel-by-the-Sea.

I can’t remember the name of the hotel, but there was some sort of tree involved, and approaching 2 a.m., it was finally in sight when the lights on the sign flickered out. By the time we’d negotiated the last traffic light and pulled up to the lobby door, it was dark inside and locked up tight. Unsure what to do, we drove a full lap around 17 Mile Drive, pulled into the parking lot at Pebble Beach, and tried to get some sleep.

I’m quite sure it’s not among Fodor’s travel tips to spend the night before your tee time at one of the world’s most famous courses, hoping sleep will come in the bucket seat of a rental car. Fortunately, the rest of the trip went well. We got Pebble Beach on a glorious blue-sky day, and I made par on all of its seaside holes except at No. 8, where I made an “X.” Spyglass Hill was the surprise of the trip.

A course just up 17 Mile Drive from Pebble and Cypress Point is no afterthought, and the Links at Spanish Bay is a surprisingly delightful nature links along the Pacific.

It will be among the most expensive bucket list trips you make, but these days that’s the norm with bucket lists.

BANDON DUNES GOLF RESORT

We East Coasters who are all privy to at least one major international airport can fly to the British Isles as quickly as we can get to the Bandon Dunes Golf Resort. So the question was always, “Why trade authentic links golf for an American impersonation?” But when you get to Bandon Dunes, you’ll realize this isn’t an impersonation of the linksland courses where the game began. It’s true, pure, American links golf. It’s a different ocean and a different style, but it’s not hard to argue that it’s every bit as good. If the soul of the game belongs to Scotland, the definition of what it inspires is found along this stretch of the Oregon coast.

The massive resort includes six courses that, like the great British Isles links, live in harmony with the land. Catch the sixteenth of the Bandon Dunes course on a clear late afternoon as the sun sets over the Pacific, and you’ll know why you travel to play the game.

The Sheep Ranch course has nine oceanside greens. Pacific Dunes may be the most natural of the courses, with fairways that roll and greens that fit perfectly among the sometimes-massive dunes. The Old Macdonald course, a tribute to the great classic-era designer Charles Blair Macdonald, celebrates classic design concepts and pays tribute to the traditions of the game. Bandon Trails works its way from atop a massive dune into maritime forests and back into the dunes. Bandon Preserve is a 13-hole par-3 course.

Other courses call themselves links courses, but they are the impersonators, mere attempts to copy what the game looks and feels like in its ancestral home. They always fall short. But Bandon Dunes, four hours south of Portland, is different. It makes no effort to be like anything other than Bandon Dunes. You can go expecting a taste of the old-world courses, but that’s not what you’ll find. If there is more scenic beauty in American golf, I haven’t come across it.

BIG CEDAR LODGE

The most famous hillbilly other than the Hatfields and McCoys struck it rich in the Ozark Mountains, and his kinfolk said, “Jed, move away from there.” So, he moved to California. Johnny Morris struck it rich in the Ozarks and decided to stay, and golfers are thankful his kinfolk didn’t make the same suggestion. The Bass Pro Shop founder didn’t move to Beverly (Hills, that is). Instead, he poured some of his billions into grandeur and golf at the Big Cedar Lodge, where the luxury is the antithesis of the Clampetts’ pre-oil-strike Ozark lifestyle.

Few who get into golf development have Morris’s resources (Forbes estimates his wealth at $8 billion). He went out and got Tiger Woods to design the flagship course at Big Cedar Lodge. Payne’s Valley is the first public-access course created by Woods’s design firm, but all five of Morris’s courses at the resort are so spectacular that in just a few years this wilderness resort in the United States’ only rugged terrain between the Appalachians and the Rockies has become one of the world’s best. Each course was built by a marquee designer and blends into the timberland here much more easily than the Clampetts blended into Beverly Hills. In addition to Woods, Jack Nicklaus, Tom Fazio, Ben Crenshaw, Bill Coore, and Gary Player have worked Morris’s Ozark land into the marquee courses of Branson, Missouri, which has become known as one of Middle America’s best golf destinations.

Morris began his road to fortune as a kid selling bait and tackle out of the back of his father’s liquor store, and he’s always been keen on connecting people with nature. Golf is one way, but so is fishing in the creeks and lakes deep in the Ozarks and a lengthy list of other outdoor activities. Indoors, Big Cedar is one of those opulent no-detail-overlooked places without being ostentatious. So, after a day on the courses, there is plenty of pampering to be done inside.

If golf were bubblin’ crude, this would be the place to drill. Sit a spell, take your shoes off, and have a heapin’ helpin’ of Morris hospitality.

Y’all come back now, y’hear?

NORTHERN MICHIGAN

When a man buys a piece of land, with it comes the right to call it whatever he wants. So, if Everett Kircher wanted to call his 552-foot vertical drop a mountain, even though in the alpine world that’s more of a molehill, then so be it. It was 1947 when Kircher bought his “mountain” in Northern Michigan for $1, giving it a place alongside the Louisiana Purchase and Manhattan as one of the greatest land deals of all time. He bought the mountain with the intent of introducing skiing to the area, and he did. In fact, Kircher became an innovator in the ski world, leading the way in snowmaking in the 1950s and in chairlifts over the next few decades.

But snow melts and skiing go dormant in the summer, even farther north than the frozen tundra of Green Bay. So Kircher climbed aboard his father’s aging Ford farm tractor and tilled up a ninehole golf course he called Hemlock. That sufficed for a while, but as interest in golf during Northern Michigan’s short summers grew, the region needed more. Kircher built more at his Boyne Resort, which now includes 10 fine courses over three separate resorts. But others also recognized the opportunity, even if last call on the golf season is a couple weeks before Halloween. Golf exploded around the small town of Gaylord, where the Gaylord Golf Mecca includes Treetops Resort with its four great courses and one of the best par-3 courses in the country; four courses at Garland Lodge and Golf Resort, and two at Ostego Resort. Traverse City is the “Cherry Capital of the World,” but the pickings for golf aren’t too slim. Shanty Creek Resort has five courses, Grand Traverse Resort and Spa has three. The treat of Northern Michigan is Forest Dunes Golf Club, a 36-hole course built on sand dunes in the middle of the state.

The whole of Northern Michigan is knitted together by a plethora of small-town courses, some public, some private, but all wonderful experiences. The granddaddy of them all is the exclusive Crystal Downs Country Club, on a bereft piece of land between Lake Michigan and Crystal Lake. It may be nowheresville, but the course is ranked alongside Winged Foot Golf Club, Pebble Beach, Muirfield Village Golf Club, and Los Angeles Country Club. Don’t turn down an invitation.

ALABAMA’S ROBERT TRENT JONES GOLF TRAIL

Sometime in the late 1980s, David G. Bonner, CEO of the Retirement Systems of Alabama, had this outlandish idea to diversify the fund’s assets by investing in golf. His thought, that investing in Alabama would mean a stronger Alabama retirement system. But golf?

What seemed like an off-the-deep-end idea wasn’t just to build a golf course, but to build 378 holes of golf on eight sites across the state. And he didn’t want to build them one at a time. So, sometime in the early 1990s a brigade of bulldozers started reshaping land around the Heart of Dixie into golf courses. Like many great innovators, he was ahead of his time. But if some slightly off-center guy in Iowa could build a baseball field to drive tourism, maybe golf could do the same thing for Alabama. And it did.

By the late 1990s golfers were pouring into the state to play golf on the Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail. These weren’t run-of-themill layouts; they were designed by one of the game’s great course designers on sites with spectacular terrain that appeared made for golf. And they were built to a scale beyond what was appropriate for the day, some stretching more than 8,000 yards. Golfers loved them, so they built more. Now, in the 384 miles between The Shoals in northwest Alabama and Lakewood Golf Club on Mobile Bay almost to the Gulf of Mexico, the unique trail of golf courses includes more than even Bonner imagined. There are 11 sites along the trail, some of which include hotels, luxury resorts, spas, restaurants, and residential developments. There are 26 courses (468 holes) on differing sites, each its own masterpiece carved from hills, valleys, marshes, and flatlands to provide a much wider variety of experiences than other destinations.

Some of the courses are named after geographical features, like the three at Hampton Cove (Highlands, River, and Short). Others make you wonder what you’re getting yourself into—Fighting Joe and Schoolmaster at The Shoals or Mindbreaker, Heartbreaker, and Backbreaker at Silver Lakes. Others just pay tribute to their location, like the Legislator, Senator, and Judge courses of Capitol Hill just north of Montgomery.

More than half a million rounds are played every year on the trail, many by golfers outside Alabama, who spend their money not just on green fees but in hotels, restaurants, and shops. It all spurs Alabama’s economy and ensures the state’s pension fund will provide retirees everything it promises.

THE SOUTHWEST DESERT

After years of winging our way to Florida for the annual respite from the brutalities of a Northeastern winter, my aging group decided we were getting too old to constantly fight the wind and the threat of rain, meaning we’d have to hang around the hotel together (entirely unacceptable). The Sunshine State doesn’t always live up to its billing in January. Someone suggested the desert.

The flight is longer and the time change is annoying, but the courses have more geographic interest, with fairways lined by desert rather than the water and condominiums of Florida.

In the desert, maybe you can’t remember your name, but you can certainly forget winter. That first year, we booked tickets to Palm Springs, which averages 350 days of sunshine each year. Streets in Palm Springs run due north-south or due east-west, sectioning the Coachella Valley into boxes like your Super Bowl betting grid. Some boxes are bigger winners than others. One square at the intersection of Frank Sinatra Drive and Bob Hope Drive contains Rancho Mirage Country Club. Another contains Desert Willow Golf Resort.

Many contain exclusive private clubs in this fashionable resort area that became a celebrity escape from Los Angeles. The squares start to fall apart as they nudge up to the Santa Rosa Mountains, and the golf gets even better at courses like Indian Wells Golf Resort and PGA West, an annual stop on the PGA Tour.

In case you haven’t noticed flying over these states, the Southwest desert is vast, and though golf plays just a small role in it, there are many green oases. Scottsdale is a hotbed for trendy shops, restaurants, and upscale resorts where course designers have creatively used the desert as hazards between holes and as forced carries to get from fairway to green at outstanding courses like Greyhawk Golf Club, Quintero Golf Club, and We-Ko-Pa Golf Club.

Las Vegas is known for its nightlife, but there are plenty of daylight hours to idle away, and the golf can be awesome. Shadow Creek Golf Course and Wynn Golf Club are two of the most expensive courses in the world to play, and while they will be two of the best you will ever play, whether they’re worth the price is up to you. There are plenty of more affordable courses around town and in other desert destinations like Mesquite, where courses like Falcon Ridge Golf Course and Wolf Creek Golf Club showcase the drama of the desert rolling right up to the edge of the playing surfaces.

The weather, scenery, outstanding courses—I’ve found many reasons to love desert golf.

DESTINATION KOHLER

Had things gone slightly differently, the spectacular land alongside Lake Michigan that Pete Dye bulldozed into one of the country’s greatest golf courses would be churning out nuclear power instead of triple bogeys. The property just north of Sheboygan was an abandoned airfield when Wisconsin Electric bought it in the 1970s and proposed the Haven Nuclear Power Plant. Local residents opposed the idea of generating great power along this great lake, and so the land’s owner eventually gave up and sold the land to the Kohler Company, the iconic plumbing-products company founded by John Michael Kohler in 1873 that is still in the Kohler family.

It’s hard to find a path from faucets to world-class golf, but Herbert Kohler, grandson of the founder, plumbed his way to a four-course destination. The marquee course, rugged and windswept Whistling Straits, has held two PGA Championships, the United States Golf Association (USGA) Senior Open and the Ryder Cup, making it one of just a few US courses open to the public on which the Ryder Cup has been played. The course is built along two miles of the Lake Michigan shoreline, exposing your shots to the sometimes-brutal weather that has caused more than 600 shipwrecks on the lake. It’s sibling, the Irish Course, is a more manageable inland layout, another Dye design that while much less decorated is still a worthy resort course. The 36-hole Blackwolf Run property, which has twice hosted the US Women’s Open, is also part of Destination Kohler.

More than just golf, the Kohler experience includes spas, fine dining, five-star hotels and remote cabins, and plenty of après-golf activities. But the draw is to play the Straits Course, which has taken down some of the best players in the world like a ship in a storm.

HAWAII: KAPALUA GOLF CLUB

If any of our states were a bucket-list destination—golf or otherwise—it would be Hawaii. Yes, it’s overdone and over-commercialized, but isn’t just about everything in golf?

The Plantation Course at Kapalua Golf Club is one of the country’s best courses open to the public, and we see it every January on television, as the PGA Tour opens each season with the Tournament of Champions. Built on the slope of the 5,800-foot Puʻu Kukui mountain, we watch every year as drives roll down steep fairways for 25 seconds, ending up sometimes more than 400 yards from where they were struck.

The course was built in the early 1990s but often has the feel of a classic Northeastern layout. You’ll never confuse it for that, as you’ll spend much of the round gazing out over the blue Pacific hoping to catch a glimpse of a whale in the distance. There are plenty of downhill shots to make you feel like a big hitter. It’s a big course with wide fairways to accommodate the wind and excessive roll, but there is still plenty of opportunity to hit a shot off the playing surface and into trouble among the trees and scrub brush of the craggy volcanic bluffs. Along the way you’ll find a punchbowl green and bunkering that resembles early-US course architecture.

The Bay Course at the resort is a much more manageable challenge, but this is Hawaii. There are ocean beaches to bask on, cuisine to enjoy, whales to watch, and waterfalls to discover. And if you’re the serious adventurer, you can venture up 10,000 feet to the summit of Mt. Haleakalā for the jaw-dropping beauty of the sunrise. But don’t forget the golf.

* * *

How many of these courses have you played? For more ideas on how to make the most of your golf experiences, check out The Golf Bucket List by Jeff Thoreson, available now!

AVAILABLE NOW

Golf Bucket List

Experience the glorious game of golf in a whole new way with this ultimate bucket list that spans the globe, for everyone who lives for their nine iron to the fan who loves watching The Masters played on TV. Tired of playing the same eighteen holes every weekend? Then this book is for you. The Golf Bucket List will introduce you to new ways

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New release
the cloud
June 25, 2024

The Cloud Sample Stories

  • Book Sample

With The Cloud you can create your own story as you make your way through this wordless picture book about how to handle big feelings and emotions like anxiety, grief, and fear, perfect for children ages three to five. Find two sample stories below!

 

The Cloud – Sample storyline (basic version) 

*This story is a work of fiction and is intended to inspire readers of The Cloud to create stories of their own. 

One day, when Mateo was playing in his room, a fluffy little cloud floated in through the window.

Curious, Mateo reached up to poke it, but it was just a little bit too high! 

So he tried jumping. It swooped up out of reach!

He tried again, and again the cloud lifted high above his head where he couldn’t touch it. 

Hmm, Mateo thought. Maybe I should just ignore it. But when he looked back at the cloud, it seemed even bigger than before. 

He opened his bedroom door. The cloud slipped out and drifted down the hallway. 

Mateo followed it into the kitchen. It was definitely getting bigger. There was no way he could ignore it!

In the living room, the cloud grew as big as the couch! 

This is no good, thought Mateo. Mama and Papa will not want a giant cloud in the house. I have to get rid of it somehow. 

The cloud was now so big and heavy, Mateo could push it through the door. He huffed and puffed and used all of his strength. Finally, with a thud, Mateo was able to shut the door. 

Phew! he thought. I’m glad the cloud is gone. 

But then, he felt something…something very much like a shadow.

He looked up. “The cloud!” he shouted. It was huge! 

Mateo felt a little scared with the giant cloud hovering over him. For a while he didn’t know what to do. Then he thought of something his Mama and Papa once told him: “Work through it, not against it.” 

Well, he thought. I’ll try going through it, then. 

So he placed his hands upon the big, heavy cloud and found a little gap. 

He climbed inside. 

It was dark and blue and never-ending inside the cloud. Mateo felt very alone. 

The shadows crept like ghosts! Mateo took several deep breaths and reminded himself to keep working through it. 

Even though it was scary, Mateo kept moving through the cloud. 

Just when he thought, I’ll be trapped like this forever! Mateo fell right out of the cloud and onto the ground of his bedroom. 

“Whoooaa…oof!” exclaimed Mateo. He looked up at the cloud. 

Somehow it was even bigger than before! He could barely see any of his bedroom. 

“I won’t let you keep hanging over me like this!” Mateo said.

He took a colored pencil from the floor and gave the cloud a great big poke. 

Boom! Clap! All of a sudden, it started raining in his bedroom! 

Mateo shouted in surprise and covered his head.

He realized that the more it rained, the more the cloud was disappearing. He could see more and more of his bedroom! The sight made him want to jump for joy. So he did.

Then he noticed light coming in through his window, growing brighter and brighter. The rain was stopping. 

“I did it!” Mateo said as the last raindrop fell. Soon, warm sunshine filled his room. 

Mateo knew that the next time he encountered a cloud, he would know exactly how to handle it. 

The End 

The Cloud – Sample storyline (specific version) 

*This story is a work of fiction and is intended to inspire readers of The Cloud to create stories of their own. 

 

Mateo was playing in his room, trying to avoid the fact that he was feeling nervous. Mama and Papa had told him that he had a doctor’s appointment tomorrow, and he did not like going to the doctor’s office! He was trying to focus on fun things, but the nervous feeling just wouldn’t go away. 

It was like having a little cloud hanging over his head. No matter how he jumped and waved his hands, the cloud of nerves would not go away!

Ignoring the cloud didn’t work either. In fact, each time he looked up at the cloud, it seemed even bigger than before! 

I’ll just leave it in the room, Mateo thought. But when he opened his bedroom door, the cloud slipped out and down the hallway. 

“Hey!” Mateo said. He followed it as it slid into the kitchen. It was definitely getting bigger. There was no way he could ignore it!

In the living room, the cloud grew as big as the couch! Mateo could feel the nervousness expanding in his tummy and his chest like it was taking over. This was not a nice feeling.  

This is no good, thought Mateo. I have to get rid of the cloud somehow. 

The cloud was now so big and heavy, Mateo could push it through the door. He huffed and puffed and used all of his strength. Finally, with a thud, Mateo was able to shut the door. 

Phew! he thought. I’m glad the cloud is gone. 

But then, he felt something…something very much like nervousness. “Oh no…”

He looked up. “The cloud!” he shouted. It was huge! 

Mateo’s heart was pounding. Now he felt both nervous and scared. For a while, he didn’t know what to do. Then he thought of something his Mama and Papa once told him: “Let yourself feel your emotions. Don’t push them away.”

Well, he thought. I’ll try to feel it, then. 

So he placed his hands upon the big, heavy cloud and found a little gap. 

He climbed inside. 

It was dark and blue and never-ending inside the cloud. Mateo felt very alone, very nervous, and very scared. 

The shadows were like  ghosts inside Mateo’s head, saying, “What if…what if…what if…” and imagining scary things that might happen at the doctor’s office. Mateo took several deep breaths and reminded himself to keep working through his emotions. 

Even though it was scary, Mateo kept moving through the cloud. “What ifs aren’t real,” he reminded himself. 

Just when he thought, I’ll be trapped like this forever! Mateo fell right out of the cloud and onto the ground of his bedroom. 

“Whoooaa…oof!” exclaimed Mateo. He looked up at the cloud. 

Somehow, it was even bigger than before! He could barely see any of his bedroom. 

“I won’t let you keep hanging over me like this!” Mateo said.

He took a colored pencil from the floor and gave the cloud a great big poke. 

Boom! Clap! All of a sudden, it started raining in his bedroom! 

Mateo shouted in surprise and covered his head.

He realized that the more it rained, the more the cloud was disappearing. He could see more and more of his bedroom! He also noticed the bad feelings in his tummy and chest fading away. This made him want to jump for joy. So he did.

Then he noticed light coming in through his window, growing brighter and brighter. The rain was stopping. 

“I did it!” Mateo said, as the last raindrop fell. Soon warm sunshine filled his room. 

Mateo knew that the next time he felt nervous or scared, he would know exactly how to handle it. 

The End 





GET CREATIVE!

The Cloud

Create your own story as you make your way through this wordless picture book about how to handle big feelings and emotions like anxiety, grief, and fear, perfect for children ages three to five. The main character of The Cloud discovers one day that he’s being followed…by a cloud! It starts out small, but soon it grows and grows until all

Learn more
New release
a parents guide to self regulation
June 17, 2024

Conquering the Second Shift: Strategies for Overwhelmed Parents

  • Health

Discovering the “right” way to parent a child is hard and utterly impossible. Everyone has their tactics and techniques, but the truth is the same: we all get overwhelmed. That is why Dr. Amber Thornton has curated the perfect tool for overwhelmed parents to help them navigate the ins and outs off parenting. You can find her book A Parent’s Guide to Self-Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycle of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children everywhere that books are sold!

Parents guide to self regulation

***

The final work email is sent, the laptop is shut, and a sigh escapes your lips. Relief washes over you for a fleeting moment, quickly replaced by the daunting reality – the “second shift” has begun. This period, stretching from the end of the workday until bedtime, is the unsung battleground for countless parents navigating the ever-present need to juggle dinner prep, cleaning, homework battles, and precious moments of family time. It’s no wonder so many parents feel utterly overwhelmed when that second shift bell rings.

The Burden of the Second Shift

The challenges parents face during this time are multifaceted. Often, there’s a simple lack of time. Between errands, preparing a healthy meal, packing lunches for the next day, and tackling the ever-growing mountain of laundry, precious time melts away like ice on a hot stove.

Exhaustion from a long day bleeds into the evening, making it difficult to summon the patience and energy needed for quality interactions with children.

The problem is further compounded by a lack of support. In many households, the responsibility for the second shift falls primarily on one parent, creating a sense of unfairness and resentment. The constant demands and sensory overload, from the cacophony of children’s voices to the flashing lights of screens, can quickly push even the most patient parent to the brink of overstimulation.

The Toll It Takes

The impact of a chronically overwhelming second shift extends far beyond feeling a little frazzled. It can lead to an unequal division of labor within the family, creating tension and resentment between partners. The constant feeling of juggling work and personal life can disrupt work-life balance, leading to dissatisfaction in both domains. Perhaps most importantly, the stress and exhaustion can take a significant toll on a parent’s mental and emotional well-being.

Understanding Our Triggers: Overwhelm and Overstimulation

To develop effective strategies for tackling the second shift, it’s important to understand what triggers our feelings of overwhelm and overstimulation. Imagine a cup overflowing with water that’s overwhelm. Each additional task or responsibility is another drop that spills over the rim, leaving you feeling utterly swamped. Overstimulation, on the other hand, is like sensory overload. Imagine your eyes bombarded by flashing lights, your ears assaulted by loud noises, and your mind constantly buzzing with demands – that’s overstimulation. Both situations can trigger similar responses:

  • Fatigue: Feeling drained and exhausted, both physically and mentally.
  • Difficulty Concentrating: Finding it hard to focus on tasks or conversations.
  • Irritability: Snapping at children or feeling short-tempered with family members.
  • Decision-Making Difficulties: Feeling paralyzed by the sheer number of choices and decisions that need to be made.
  • Isolation: Withdrawing from family interactions and social connections.

Conquering the Second Shift: Strategies and Tools

The good news is that you’re not powerless against the second shift. By employing a few key strategies and reframing your perspective on this time period, you can reclaim your evenings and turn them into opportunities for connection and family fun.

1. Setting Firm Boundaries Between Work and Family Life

The first step is to create a clear separation between your work life and your family life. This may require setting boundaries with your employer. Avoid checking work emails or taking calls outside of work hours, especially during dinner or family game nights. Utilize tools like “Do not disturb” modes on your phone and consider creating a dedicated “work zone” in your house that’s off-limits after work hours. This helps reinforce the mental shift and allows you to be fully present for your family when you’re at home.

2. Creating a Schedule and Routine

Having a structured schedule can help bring order to the chaos of the second shift. This doesn’t have to be a rigid itinerary, but rather a general framework that provides a sense of control.

Allocate specific time slots for activities like dinner, homework help, playtime, and relaxation. This helps manage expectations and provides a foundation for smooth transitions. Involve your children in creating the schedule, giving them a sense of ownership and making them more likely to cooperate.

3. The Power of Delegation and Collaboration

You don’t have to be a superhero who tackles everything alone. Delegation is your friend. Distribute age-appropriate chores amongst family members. Older children can help with setting the table, younger ones can sort laundry. Even young children can be taught to put away their toys or clear the dinner table. This not only lightens your load but also fosters a sense of responsibility and teamwork within the family. Collaboration goes beyond chores. Brainstorm ideas for dinner together, involve everyone in the cleanup process, and plan family game nights where everyone contributes to the fun.

4. Prioritizing Relaxation and Connection

Remember, the second shift isn’t just about crossing tasks off a to-do list. It’s also about connecting with your family and creating lasting memories.

  •  Schedule Relaxation Time: Just as you schedule time for chores and homework, schedule time for unwinding.This could be a shared family activity like reading a book together, watching a movie, or taking a walk after dinner.It could also be individual relaxation time for each family member – you might enjoy a quiet bath while your partner reads to the children or your children have designated “quiet time” with coloring books or puzzles.
  • Focus on Quality over Quantity: Don’t get caught in the trap of feeling obligated to fill every hour with structured activities. Sometimes the most meaningful moments arise organically. Building a pillow fort for a family movie night, playing a spontaneous board game, or simply snuggling on the couch with your children are moments to treasure.
  • Practice Mindfulness: The second shift is a prime time to practice mindfulness techniques as a family. Take a few deep breaths together after a busy day, or engage in short, guided meditations before bedtime. This helps everyone calm down, reduce stress, and become more present in the moment.

Embrace Imperfections and Let Go

Sometimes, the second shift throws unexpected curveballs. A spilled dinner, a homework meltdown, or a last-minute work call can quickly derail your carefully crafted schedule. Remember, you’re not aiming for perfection. Embrace the chaos, laugh it off together, and focus on creating a positive and supportive family environment. Let go of the guilt of not completing everything on your to-do list.

Communication is Key

Open communication with your partner is crucial. Discuss the division of chores and responsibilities. Talk about your expectations for the second shift and what you both need to feel supported. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, express your needs clearly. Your partner may be willing to adjust their schedule or lend a helping hand if they understand your struggles.

Seeking Additional Support

Don’t be afraid to seek additional support. Consider hiring a part-time housekeeper for some tasks, or explore childcare options to lighten the load on busy evenings. Talk to extended family or friends to see if they can offer help with dinners or childcare a couple of nights a week. Don’t be afraid to ask for help – it’s a sign of strength, not weakness.

Reframing the Second Shift

Instead of viewing the second shift as a chore-filled marathon, try to reframe it as an opportunity for connection. It’s a time to strengthen bonds with your children, create lasting memories, and build a foundation for a happy and healthy family. Remember, quality time spent with your children doesn’t have to be elaborate or expensive. It’s the simple, everyday moments of shared laughter, warmth, and love that truly matter.

Additional Resources

If you’re looking for further guidance on managing stress and overwhelm, consider reading my book “A Parent’s Guide to Self Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycles of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children.” This book provides practical strategies and techniques for managing your emotional well-being and fostering a calmer, more positive household.

This journey of conquering the second shift is an ongoing process. There will be days when you feel like a master chef and a superhero parent, and there will be evenings that leave you longing for a quiet corner to hide in. But by implementing these strategies, cultivating open communication, and prioritizing connection with your family, you can transform the second shift into a time of joy, laughter, and meaningful moments that will last a lifetime. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and with a little planning and support, you can reclaim your evenings and build a strong, happy family unit, one second shift at a time.

Dr. Amber Thornton
Meet the Author

Dr. Amber Thornton

Dr. Amber Thornton is a licensed Clinical Psychologist and strong advocate for the mental health and well-being of parents. Dr. Amber loves writing and creating content online that will speak to the everyday struggles of ...

perenting
May 21, 2024

Navigating Parenthood: Overcoming the 5 Biggest Concerns of Dysregulated Parents

  • Book Sample

Parents guide to self regulation

When it comes to emotional regulation during parenting the topic always can be a little overwhelming. Being a parent is already hard and dealing with our own emotions plus the big emotions of our tiny humans, can make it even harder. Dr. Amber Thornton, a licensed Clinical Psychologist and strong advocate for the mental health and well-being of parents and Ulysses Press author explains in this article the biggest concerns of dysregulated parents! You can find this and more advice on self regulating emotions and becoming a better parent in her newly released book A Parent’s Guide to Self-Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycle of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children.

***

Parenting isn’t easy. We all experience moments of overwhelm, frustration, and self-doubt. I’ve struggled with these emotions myself – feeling overstimulated, irritable, and inadequate at times. However, through my research and personal experiences, I’ve realized that I’m not alone. Many parents out there are grappling with similar feelings, wondering if they’re doing enough for their children and questioning their own abilities.I’m not alone and neither are you. I’ve been there, too. Through my work and research with parents, I’ve discovered that there’s a way forward – a way to break free from the cycle of dysregulation and become the parent you’ve always wanted to be.

I’m thrilled to share some game-changing insights from my upcoming book, A Parent’s Guide to Self-Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycle of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children. Writing this book has helped me to reflect even more on my own journey as a parent and the hurdles I’ve overcome along the way.

In my book, I tackle five common concerns that many parents face when it comes to managing their emotions and their children’s. These concerns can weigh heavily on us, causing doubt and anxiety. But they don’t have to define us. With the right tools and strategies, we can transform these challenges into opportunities for growth and connection.

1. Am I inadequate as a parent?

This is a question that haunted me for a long time. I used to feel like I was failing my children because I couldn’t always keep my cool or handle difficult situations with grace. But as I’ve delved deeper into the topic of self-regulation, I’ve come to understand that every moment with my children is a learning opportunity. Even the mistakes and mishaps are chances for growth. In my book, I encourage parents to shift their perspective from feeling inadequate to recognizing the progress they’ve made and the lessons they’ve learned along the way.

Furthermore, I’ve learned that embracing imperfection is essential to fostering resilience in ourselves and our children. By acknowledging our shortcomings and openly discussing them, we create an environment where growth and self-improvement are celebrated. It’s not about being a flawless parent; it’s about showing up, learning from our experiences, and continuously striving to do better for our families.

2. Am I setting a bad example for self-regulation for my kids?

As a parent, I’ve often worried that my struggles with dysregulation would negatively impact my children’s ability to manage their emotions. But what if I’m not setting a bad example at all? What if, instead, I’m showing them that it’s okay to be human and to make mistakes? In my book, I explore the importance of modeling self-compassion and resilience for our children, even when we’re facing our own challenges.

Moreover, I’ve realized that by openly acknowledging my struggles and actively working on self-regulation, I’m teaching my children valuable lessons about resilience and growth mindset. They see that it’s normal to experience emotions and that it’s possible to bounce back from setbacks. Instead of striving for perfection, I aim to show them the power of self-awareness and the importance of seeking support when needed.

3. Am I repeating a pattern of parenting that I grew up with?

This question hits close to home for many of us. We’re often keenly aware of the ways in which our own upbringing influences our parenting style, and we may worry about perpetuating harmful patterns. But what if we’re not doomed to repeat the past? What if we can break free from those cycles and create a new, healthier dynamic with our children? In my book, I offer strategies for recognizing and challenging these patterns, paving the way for positive change.

Additionally, I’ve found that understanding the roots of my parenting behaviors has been instrumental in breaking the cycle. By examining my own upbringing and the patterns I observed, I’ve gained insight into why I react certain ways and how I can choose different approaches for my own family. It’s empowering to know that I have the power to rewrite my parenting narrative and create a more nurturing environment for my children.

4. How will I ever learn to self-regulate when times are always hard?

Parenting is tough, and life is full of challenges. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed and wonder if we’ll ever be able to get a handle on our emotions. But what if every difficulty is an opportunity for growth? What if we can learn to navigate life’s ups and downs with greater resilience and self-awareness? In my book, I provide practical tools and techniques for managing stress and regulating emotions, even in the face of adversity.

Furthermore, I’ve come to see challenges as opportunities for personal growth and transformation. Instead of viewing difficult times as insurmountable obstacles, I approach them as chances to develop my self-regulation skills and strengthen my resilience. By practicing mindfulness, setting boundaries, and seeking support when needed, I’ve learned to navigate even the toughest situations with more ease and grace.

5. Will my dysregulation cause a lasting impact on the relationship with my family or their mental health?

This is perhaps the most heart-wrenching question of all. We want nothing more than to provide a loving, supportive environment for our children, and we worry that our own struggles will harm them in some way. But what if our efforts to repair and grow actually strengthen our relationships in the long run? What if our children learn resilience and empathy from witnessing our journey? In my book, I emphasize the importance of repair and accountability in maintaining healthy family dynamics, offering guidance for nurturing strong, resilient connections with our loved ones.

Moreover, I’ve found that by acknowledging my mistakes and taking responsibility for my actions, I’ve deepened my connections with my family. When I apologize and make amends, I show my children that I value our relationship and am committed to fostering trust and understanding. Through this process of repair, we not only heal any wounds caused by dysregulation but also strengthen the bonds that hold us together as a family. Through my own experiences and the stories shared by other parents, I’ve come to believe that self-regulation is not just a skill – it’s a journey of self-discovery and growth.

And while it’s not always easy, it is possible to cultivate greater emotional resilience and create a more nurturing environment for ourselves and our children. So if you’re tired of feeling overwhelmed and unsure of yourself as a parent, if you’re ready to take control of your emotions and create a more harmonious family dynamic, then this book is for you.

Join me on this journey as we explore the power of self-regulation and discover how it can revolutionize your parenting experience.

I invite you to order A Parent’s Guide to Self-Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycles of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children, and join me on this journey toward growth and self-discovery. Together, we can create a more nurturing and supportive environment for ourselves and our children.

Thanks for tuning in today, and I’ll catch you next time. Take care!

Dr. Amber Thornton

Learn more about Dr. Amber

Dr. Amber Thornton

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